I can’t write

I can’t write.

But I have things to say. So many things. It is all stuck up there in my head, and keeps me awake as I lie there and listen to the cars drive by and the coyotes howl. It is incredible that I live in a metropolitan area and yet still have the pleasure of wild things singing me to sleep insomnia. I swear, the best sleep of my life was lying in my hammock in a Costa Rica jungle listening to the symphony of a thousand birds, monkeys and insects. I close my eyes and imagine that place. It it a testament to the human brain that I can extract only the good memories from the places I have been and completely forget about the person I was there with. It’s like my prom photo from high school… My dad put a paper cutout over the guy’s face and wrote “watch this space”…

That still makes me smile.

I had a retrospective of my relationships last night as I was lying there awake and not sleeping. Again. I’ve dated plenty of guys. There have been just a handful of significant long-term relationships, and another handful of short-term ones. In those two handfuls of experiences, I can’t say that I’ve ever truly been in love. Not the kind of love that makes time stand still. Where the memories you make are not about the places you go, but where nothing else matters but the person you are with. I’m happy with these experiences, although I realize that some of them went on longer than they should have… but it is all about learning. I am sure that when I least expect it, The One is going to swoop into my life like a frying pan in the face.

Until then… well, there are a lot of frogs to kiss! And I’ve never had more fun than I’m having right now!

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